There are a variety of tools and resources available to help parents feel at ease with introducing their children to technology.As young teenagers enter middle school, many begin asking for smartphones, tablets and social media accounts. But some parents may worry about the emotional and physical safety that can come with these.
Two experts from the University of Alabama at Birmingham explain measures parents can take to safely introduce their children to technology.
Strategies to introduce technology
If parents decide to allow their student a device, says Margaret Canter, Ph.D., assistant professor in the Department of Pediatrics, it is important to set a standard from day one.
“From the beginning, I would present any technology as a privilege and explain that it is a parent’s responsibility to monitor the content and keep them safe,” Canter said. “It is not that the child cannot be trusted; it is that the family does not know everyone they could encounter online, and other individuals’ intentions are not known.”
Canter recommends only allowing the device in common areas where a parent could walk by and hear or see what is being viewed at any point.
“Think of it as a trial period. Children need to demonstrate that they can be safe online and handle the restrictions put in place. If it becomes more trouble than it is worth, parents can make the decision to withdraw the privilege for a period of time.”
Another strategy to ensure a smooth introduction to technology is a technology contract. This contract can outline what websites and apps the child is allowed to use, the process for requesting access to something new, where the child is allowed to use the device and how long they can use it each day.
A part of the contract can require the device to be checked in at a certain time in the evening, so parents do not have to worry about the device’s negatively impacting sleep. Canter recommends that parents make it clear that they have the right to update and amend this contract at any time.
“Just as a dealership will reclaim a car if the person leasing it is not maintaining it appropriately, the parent has the responsibility to reclaim the technology if the child is not following the outlined rules and/or putting themself in unsafe situations.”
Conversations to have before introducing technology
Because people can present themselves differently online than they are in real life, it is important for parents to talk with their children about online safety before allowing technology or social media.
“Parents should stress that it is never safe to share personal information such as date of birth, address and school name,” Canter said. “I encourage families to disable chat features in games or only allow chatting with approved contacts for safety.”
Department of Computer Science assistant professor and undergraduate program director Amber Wagner, Ph.D., recommends parents emphasize the importance of children “thinking carefully before sharing anything and understanding what they say has the potential to not remain private and stay online forever.”
This conversation provides the opportunity to reassure children they can come to a trusted parent or adult if someone does anything or says anything online that makes them feel uncomfortable.
“If they come in good faith, I would try not to punish them, even if they handled the situation poorly. It is also important to stay calm, so they continue to come to you in these tricky situations,” Canter said. “Together, you can work to do what you can to restrict certain people or content to help prevent them from being exposed to inappropriate content.”
Tools and resources
There are a variety of tools and resources available to help parents feel at ease with introducing their children to technology.
Tools such as parental control apps and software can help monitor, protect and restrict how children use technology, as well as the types of content they access. Parents can add these controls to devices and browsers through extensions.
Parental controls can specifically block inappropriate content or topics parents do not want their children exposed to, limit screen time, and offer cyberbully protection.
Wagner recommends parents consider controls for screen time and monitor content activity.
“Limiting screen time is important but can be done in different ways. I think it is best to limit individual apps that lead to doom scrolling like social media and encourage creative apps.”
Some smartphone devices include controls in their system settings to set screen time, enhance privacy and security, adjust app permissions, and monitor location.
Wagner suggests researching settings on devices that can act as a safeguard option for parents, such as one called assistive access. Originally designed for individuals with cognitive disabilities, assistive access can be used for children who are being introduced to technology. It allows parents to select permitted apps, restrict internet access and protect control changes with a password.
If technology becomes overwhelming, Wagner encourages parents to “monitor their behavior and habits in the real world. If they start becoming crabby, they have had too much screen time. Encourage them to go outside, read, work on puzzles or play board games to disconnect from the screen.”
“Purposefully exposing technology to children is important as their futures will benefit from it the most,” Wagner said.